Thursday, April 28, 2011

Somewhere weakness is my strength

I've only just begun day 4 of my 30 day raw vegan experience, and I'm already about to give up. For the last two days I have been saying to myself that I'm just going to end it and deal with failure, but I haven't done that yet, praise God.

This whole thing is showing me how weak I really am, how dependent I am on certain things, how much I need God to make it through.

My body has finally finished detoxing from all the harmful additives in food we digest on a daily basis, which means my headaches are gone and I've stopped shaking. But I'm still having cravings. I really want to devour an entire chocolate cake by myself; I just want a taste of something other than raw fruits and vegetables.

I am having such a hard time with this, but I can't even imagine what it's like for the other four people doing this with me. See, I was a vegetarian already so I'm used to not eating meat. But the others have had to give up way more than me and I can see how hard this is on them.
And not only is it a huge temptation to quit because of the different food I am craving, but it is also starting to become a burden for me financially. I've had to go to the grocery store every day so far, and I've spent over $50 in groceries. Fruits and vegetables don't last long on the freshness side, and I've had to eat more than usual to keep from going hungry.

God has already been teaching me so much through this, and part of me really wants to continue with this adventure and glean everything I can from it. And then there's the part of me that wants to give up so so badly.

I wear a bracelet on my left wrist that has the reference 2 Corinthians 12:9 on one side, and "LIVEWEAK" on the other. This experience is putting a whole new, fresh emphasis on my heart.

peace, love, and attempting perseverance.

Saturday, April 23, 2011


How do I go about doing what I feel God is calling me to do at this particular moment in my life, when my mom doesn't want me to do that? How do I continue to be respectful to her and honor her? Someone, please. If you have an answer, send it my way. I need some direction here.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

In this body, we will live

This is an older post from 2006, I believe. But I really like it, and I've edited it a bit:

I was thinking about the human body, recently. Honestly, I have no idea why. I was just thinking about it. Have you ever realized how completely complex it is? I mean, seriously, how the heck did God come up with that? Mad props to Him. Not only that, but He made two types of the human body: male and female, just to add a mixture of complexity.

Think about it. Men - hunters, pursuers, Mr. Fix-its. Women - emotional range of the atlantic ocean, mysterious, valuable. The two beings fit together perfectly. Who in there right mind could honestly unveil something as insane and amazing as this?

I was at a camp a few years ago and in our seminar time, they kept saying, "God isn't big. He's beyond." That really hit me when I started thinking about how our lungs know to breathe when we are unconcious, how if we've been burned our brain tells our bodies. Or even how our heart knows the right time to beat. Only God could have come up with something like that. God isn't big. He's beyond. God's love is beyond.

God loves us so much. His love is so beyond, that we almost never understand why things are the way they are, or why situations turn out the way they do. The most we can do is love God back.

peace, love, and reflection.
kae. li.

Monday, April 11, 2011


Hello beautiful people.

I have started a new blog which will be nothing but poems I have written. It is a fantastical journey I am ready for, and I hope you will join me.

But fear not! This blog will still exist and I will still be updating it. However, it will be more of an actual blog than a poetry slam.

So to see my poems, you must now go here. And I hope you will, because I am excited about this.

peace, love, and rockets.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

An untitled poem about negative comparison and positive discovery

"How insignificant I seem,"
said the little seed,
"Why do I compare me
to the olive tree?
Nothing comes easy,
not even melodies.
And honestly,
I don't need your sympathy.
Farmers sow and reap -
they like what they see -
but I'm painted in ivory.
My envy screams like a cacophony
but You resist the urge to leave.
You stop and look at me,
the lonely little seed;
You rest me on Your knee
and tell me how I'm lovely.
Then You plant me by the sea
and I have life, suddenly,
like You've handed me an eternal key.
I begin to grow and spring
from the dirt and soiling;
I shower down my many leaves
and they drift off in evening breeze.
I am not an olive tree,
for I have been made differently,
but I am slowly blossoming
into who I was made to be."

peace, love, and uniqueness.