Thursday, September 24, 2009

Really real reality

Man, it has been a long time since I last posted on this thing. To those of you that actually read this, I am so sorry. But now that I'm back on here, let's get down to business.

I've been going through some changes, recently, in all aspects of my life. The biggest ones being spiritual and emotional. Obviously I haven't grown in height, or gotten shorter for that matter; my feet are the same size 8 feet they have been since 7th grade; I think it's safe to say I haven't changed much physically, besides my constant hair color/cut changing.

I won't lie to you - my relationship with God has truly suffered since I've been back from Sweden, but that is beginning to change, and I can tell you that I am relieved to finally feel God again. A father figure of mine, whom I often call "dad," pointed something out to me months ago and for whatever reason, it's just hitting me now. He said that when I go through difficult times in my life, I have a tendency to isolate myself from people - people that love me and care about me and want to see me succeed. But something that gave me a swift kick in the pants was when I realized that I also isolate myself from God, my number one source of life.

Without God, I wouldn't have the things in life I am so blessed to have. Without God, I wouldn't have a voice with something to say. Without God, I wouldn't have hope.

I am beginning to see things differently now; I'm beginning to see myself differently now.

Since I was really little, I've had this dream in the back of my mind that God was going to use me in a really cool way. As I've gotten older, it's gone from just my imagination to mostly reality. And I can't take any credit for that. I've always sort of known that God had big plans for me, and now it's time for me to sit back and let Him start working in my life in His usual, yet unusual mysterious ways. I'm ready for the ride.

peace, love, and reality.
kaeli

2 comments:

uthpastorjj said...

Oh that father figure...what does he know?

It's good to see ya back to blogging. And good to see ya just back.

thewhisper said...

=P